good day to you lot, welcome to another exciting episode of loose women.. its not but it conjurers up the idea its either porn or something worth reading about. which will have to be decided by the following taps of the key and you opinion. so we had another episode of MY BIG FAT GYPSY WEDDING last night, and i have to show my disappointment at not seeing any GRABBING at all, i feel robbed, i been looking forward all week to picking up some hits n tips as well as the location of the car park in episode 1 that i still haven't found.
this week was about two things mainly, some deluded 17 year old Jordan wannabe who had a dress quoted in today's Guardian newspaper as weighing 20 stone, which from the looks of her is more than 5 stone heavier than she is, complete with about £80 worth of Duracell batteries what does power the masses of fairy lights hidden in the dress for her "surprise revealing" on her first dance which was to UB40's "red red wine" (*note to this poor girl.. u can request whatever song you want for your "first dance", i can recommend something slow, such as Shania Twain - You're Still the One) im sure its one of the most popular songs in the land for weddings. (i used to really want WAYNE WONDERS - NO LETTING GO as my wedding song, but seeing as ive not actually managed to drag any poor girl up the isle, i think i may be able to get a hover car to the church by the time i actually find "the one" and by ONE i mean anyone..lol)
so back to this bloody gypo wedding.. basically the girl looked like a cross between a UFO and a meringue once the lights have been switched off to show a PIMPED OUT dress complete with moving butterfly wings. Now i can see why someone would Go mad buying a nice dress and that but then they totally loose interest when it comes to the venue for holding the reception or having any sort of dress restrictions for guests, i mean i kept seeing people wearing tracksuits, leggings and generally making no effort as a guest at the weddings we been shown so far. who turns up to a wedding in a fucking tracksuit? i would tell them to piss off and think they was being disrespectful.
as compelling as this series is, i think we are only being shown the better class of travellers as i know from first hand experience that they are not as friendly as we are being led to believe, it got a bit closer to the real deal when Dale Farm was shown, where we got to meet 6 & 8 year old children who were having spray tans (i see spray tans being offered in a tent at Dagenham market for about £15, who the fuck goes to the Market for a spray tan? i feel like ive only just got to planet earth and still finding peoples behaviour a bit odd), these kids were a lot more tatty n rough around the edges than last weeks "gypsy princesses", who by comparison weren't that bad and had even me thinking that i might be able to be convinced to marry one of the fuckers, but these little dodgy characters had me cringing as they got covered in make up complete with "beauty spot", but is wasn't until after the kids had there Conformation that i really felt social services need to get in there and say something about tiny kids wearing batty riders, and vest tops usually reserved for pole dancers and prostitutes, but each to their own i suppose. lol
in the trailer for next week it showed that Grabbing is back on the menu, so i shall be watching strictly for that purpose!!
yesterday i wrote a funny and what i thought witty joke about Jedward..as follows...Jedward, i cant tell them 2 apart..which one is the Gay one? >> about 4 hours later some fans of Jedward started twittering me saying how upset they was at me, and i was being homophobic and didn't know them, i cant tell you how much i laughed at this, it really did brighten up my evening knowing somewhere out there i pissed off some die hard Jedward fans. my life is complete.
right now this podcast, i am pleased to say it got to number 1 in the iTunes "new and noteworthy" chart yesterday, its going really well and im really looking forward to recording number 5 this coming Monday, so if you have an iPhone or an iTunes account please do take the time to download it and have a sneaky listen, i would be most grateful if you even managed to write a review "hint hint"..here is the link again in case you didn't get it the first 100 times.
http://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/big-clever-truevip/id411049804
in life failure is not an option, but its a way out for the weak and lazy, its better to try and decide its not for you rather than sit in your house talking about what you would do if you had this and that, i know opportunities dont really knock at your door as the program says "opportunity knocks"..it dont, but i am willing to put my hand to most things but if something isnt for me than i probably wont waste my time with it. i feel that doing things just to please others will eventually lead to unhappyness, its ok to be selfish as long as you get the balance right in the end. this isnt a dig and at anyone but just a state of mind.
right gonna cut it there and go do something productive, remember positive attitudes can make positive things happen, January is always a bad moth seeing as most people are gonna still be paying for Christmas and wont get back on their feet till February and the weather isnt really helping, so bare that in mind and know that summer will be here before you know it x
be good and think at least i don't live in a caravan..and if u do life in a caravan..get down the fucking council its 2011 for fuck sake
Tuesday, 1 February 2011
21st jan 2011 - my big fat gypsy blog
hey hey hey... the weekend has finally landed peoples, and mine has nothing planned.. i have gave some serious thought to spending the weekend GRABBING, which im looking into as my new pastime. and i shall be playing the DVD of MY BIG FAT GYPSY WEDDING in court as my defence, and claiming a Romany way of life states that "i may approach an unscandalised girl and GRAB her with the intention of KISSING her and making her my future wife"
Some of you may be reading this thinking that it sounds awfully alot like sexual assault or attempted rape and for those amongst us with a moral compass that points NORTH and not to the nearest pub/drug dealer would be correct, but this is not us we are talking about. of course i am talking about the channel 4 program MY BIG FAT GYPSY WEDDING broadcast on TV this week.
We got to meet a colourful bunch of people and by colourful i do mean the dresses (most of them were highlighter pen pink or had fairly lights which made the girls look like a cross between prostitute brides and the Christmas fairy that goes on top of the Christmas tree), The assumption here is that they are giving the girls the "BEST DAY OF THEIR LIVES" which to me sounds depressing because its all downhill from then. We can see that they are spending absolutely thousands on dresses, not so much on everything else, which brings me to ask the question... how are they paying for these fucking things??? not once did i hear how anybody earns a living on this program, not even a hint which makes me very suspicious.
im not going to assume they are in receipt of benefits, i will probably think at least some of them are though, as with any group of people. so with this in mind i am asking if anyone wants there DRIVE WAY sorted out as i have this fucking ridiculous dress to pay for, lol, failing that i have pegs, lots of lovely pegs.
i can say with authority though, none of the gypsy's i have encountered have shown any indication of spending any money on anything other than alcohol.. and i should know.
when i was 15 i met my kids mum and was told i wasn't to see her again as my mum thought she wasn't very nice (she was right in the end lol), well my mum said "you do as i say or you move out" needless to say thats the day i moved out of my mums house. at the time my mum was drinking heavily and it was actually a relief to leave, it was about this time she met (in the park drinking) a, well i was going to call him a Man but frankly he was an embarrassment of a human being (he looked like the Irish equivalent to RAB C NESBIT, he used to wear a suit and a T shirt with trainers, the only thing missing was the bandage on the head). he moved into my mums straight away and brought his two daughters with him, they were only about 10 and 11 i think. i didnt feel any hate towards them as they were only children and didnt really know any better, even when i heard one of them tell my mum to "FUCK OFF" this was a total shock to me, as if i had even told my mum No she would of put me in a coma. but here was this 10 year old telling my mum to FUCK OFF, it was quite a shock to watch my mum take that sort of thing so lightly.
the house then become a shithole almost over night, dont get me wrong it wasnt a palace before, but it was basic and clean like "Kwick Save No Frills Brand", i went round and they would be drinking out of washed our coffee jars and there would be loads of people about who i didnt know, or really want to know.. they were scum. these are the people you see drinking Tenants strong larger on the park benches, i couldn't believe MY MUM was was even talking to these kind of people, let alone living with one.
it wasn't long before he Hit my mum, and i spoke to her about what she wanted to do, she said they were both drunk and it was a one off, i offered to go and see him (to do what im not sure, i was 15 and he was a 40 year old man). it was about this time that my girlfriend got pregnant, i was still 15, i was at school and working weekends as a trainee chef, so i kinda had my hands full living in Brixton's Myatts field estate trying to keep my sanity with the news that i was going to be a Dad at 16. but with most things that present themselves in my life i decided to take this responsibility head on, and even though cracks had appeared in our relationship i thought, im not going to run away from this and i will do the best by my child..
i used to pop in on my mum when i could but lets face it, i was the child with a kid on the way and she was supposed to be an adult, i had my own family to look after..
a few years into my mums relationship he has to go to a funeral in Ireland and was involved in a despite with another family and was decapitated, now without sounding evil, it was the best thing that could of happend for my mum as she wasn't going to get away from him any other way.
during the time they were together we went for a meal in the Indian restaurant next door to camberwell police station, this was my mums way of treating me and my kids mum.
so we sat down and was told to order whatever we wanted, it was at this point i could smell a rat, and im not talking about the food.. during the meal He kept trying to antagonise the waiters with various tit bits of information and comments such as (him) you ok? (waiter) yes sir (him) you married? (waiter) yes sir (him) wheres your wife now? (waiter) she will be in bed now sir (him) who with?
now stuff like that isnt very nice, although it is quite funny in an evil way.. Indian restaurant staff are not targets for any sort of abuse in my eyes as they are usually very placid and polite.. So when the end of the meal comes i was told that me and my kids mum should leave as nobody was going to be paying the bill, it was kind of funny and i have walked out of restaurants since without paying, but inviting somebody out for a meal then running out is another story altogether.
i know im kind of generalising gypsy's but there are more than one type, pikey's and gypsy's, i haven't worked out whos who on this TV program yet lol.
Remember if you have any feedback on my blogs/podcasts please feel free to message me, i do always try and message back.. the podcasts are now in the ITunes top 100 comedy podcasts and if you haven't downloaded at least one of them, what have u been doing? its really simple just click on this link and it will take u to iTunes
http://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/big-clever-truevip/id411049804
so until next time, be very good or very very bad.. this weekend im off until Tuesday so Grabbing will feature heavily in my weekends activities lol
Some of you may be reading this thinking that it sounds awfully alot like sexual assault or attempted rape and for those amongst us with a moral compass that points NORTH and not to the nearest pub/drug dealer would be correct, but this is not us we are talking about. of course i am talking about the channel 4 program MY BIG FAT GYPSY WEDDING broadcast on TV this week.
We got to meet a colourful bunch of people and by colourful i do mean the dresses (most of them were highlighter pen pink or had fairly lights which made the girls look like a cross between prostitute brides and the Christmas fairy that goes on top of the Christmas tree), The assumption here is that they are giving the girls the "BEST DAY OF THEIR LIVES" which to me sounds depressing because its all downhill from then. We can see that they are spending absolutely thousands on dresses, not so much on everything else, which brings me to ask the question... how are they paying for these fucking things??? not once did i hear how anybody earns a living on this program, not even a hint which makes me very suspicious.
im not going to assume they are in receipt of benefits, i will probably think at least some of them are though, as with any group of people. so with this in mind i am asking if anyone wants there DRIVE WAY sorted out as i have this fucking ridiculous dress to pay for, lol, failing that i have pegs, lots of lovely pegs.
i can say with authority though, none of the gypsy's i have encountered have shown any indication of spending any money on anything other than alcohol.. and i should know.
when i was 15 i met my kids mum and was told i wasn't to see her again as my mum thought she wasn't very nice (she was right in the end lol), well my mum said "you do as i say or you move out" needless to say thats the day i moved out of my mums house. at the time my mum was drinking heavily and it was actually a relief to leave, it was about this time she met (in the park drinking) a, well i was going to call him a Man but frankly he was an embarrassment of a human being (he looked like the Irish equivalent to RAB C NESBIT, he used to wear a suit and a T shirt with trainers, the only thing missing was the bandage on the head). he moved into my mums straight away and brought his two daughters with him, they were only about 10 and 11 i think. i didnt feel any hate towards them as they were only children and didnt really know any better, even when i heard one of them tell my mum to "FUCK OFF" this was a total shock to me, as if i had even told my mum No she would of put me in a coma. but here was this 10 year old telling my mum to FUCK OFF, it was quite a shock to watch my mum take that sort of thing so lightly.
the house then become a shithole almost over night, dont get me wrong it wasnt a palace before, but it was basic and clean like "Kwick Save No Frills Brand", i went round and they would be drinking out of washed our coffee jars and there would be loads of people about who i didnt know, or really want to know.. they were scum. these are the people you see drinking Tenants strong larger on the park benches, i couldn't believe MY MUM was was even talking to these kind of people, let alone living with one.
it wasn't long before he Hit my mum, and i spoke to her about what she wanted to do, she said they were both drunk and it was a one off, i offered to go and see him (to do what im not sure, i was 15 and he was a 40 year old man). it was about this time that my girlfriend got pregnant, i was still 15, i was at school and working weekends as a trainee chef, so i kinda had my hands full living in Brixton's Myatts field estate trying to keep my sanity with the news that i was going to be a Dad at 16. but with most things that present themselves in my life i decided to take this responsibility head on, and even though cracks had appeared in our relationship i thought, im not going to run away from this and i will do the best by my child..
i used to pop in on my mum when i could but lets face it, i was the child with a kid on the way and she was supposed to be an adult, i had my own family to look after..
a few years into my mums relationship he has to go to a funeral in Ireland and was involved in a despite with another family and was decapitated, now without sounding evil, it was the best thing that could of happend for my mum as she wasn't going to get away from him any other way.
during the time they were together we went for a meal in the Indian restaurant next door to camberwell police station, this was my mums way of treating me and my kids mum.
so we sat down and was told to order whatever we wanted, it was at this point i could smell a rat, and im not talking about the food.. during the meal He kept trying to antagonise the waiters with various tit bits of information and comments such as (him) you ok? (waiter) yes sir (him) you married? (waiter) yes sir (him) wheres your wife now? (waiter) she will be in bed now sir (him) who with?
now stuff like that isnt very nice, although it is quite funny in an evil way.. Indian restaurant staff are not targets for any sort of abuse in my eyes as they are usually very placid and polite.. So when the end of the meal comes i was told that me and my kids mum should leave as nobody was going to be paying the bill, it was kind of funny and i have walked out of restaurants since without paying, but inviting somebody out for a meal then running out is another story altogether.
i know im kind of generalising gypsy's but there are more than one type, pikey's and gypsy's, i haven't worked out whos who on this TV program yet lol.
Remember if you have any feedback on my blogs/podcasts please feel free to message me, i do always try and message back.. the podcasts are now in the ITunes top 100 comedy podcasts and if you haven't downloaded at least one of them, what have u been doing? its really simple just click on this link and it will take u to iTunes
http://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/big-clever-truevip/id411049804
so until next time, be very good or very very bad.. this weekend im off until Tuesday so Grabbing will feature heavily in my weekends activities lol
12th jan garage
Good aftermorningofnight depending on when your actually bothering to read this shizzle, welcome to this ere blog that i am writing to tell you whats what in the world of cats and dogs..its not but if your easily swayed by dangling a cute puppy in front of you then i shall continue with the blackmail and tell you from the start i would like some feedback on these blogs and that if you dont download my podcast from i tunes (big and clever) i will randomly select the cutest kittens & puppies to go in a brown potato sack, and throw the sack in the thames directly off tower bridge, which so happens to be my favourite spot in london, dunno why other than its such a nice bridge and i been in the museum bit above about 4 times, as well as taking various dates there over the many years i have been alive in this big and clever world.
been getting in a bit of tournament poker lately, sunday i played in one at the mint casino and when we got down to the last 4 players, someone suggested we split the money, being in second place at the time i thought "why not", i was only gonna win £280 if we played it out and i actually won second place, and seeing as their was 3 other players to consider, i thought it not bad odds taking £250... sweetshop here i come!!
since the whole should i shouldn't i, with the Cambridge diet, i decided.. still not 100% convinced as i treat anything and everything with total and utter suspicion.. well i got a personal trainer who has allocated what i should eat and treats me to being able to do some boxing in the gym which includes hitting him, which is nice when you have had a stressful day, then the next day you get to ache all over for no extra money which is nice if you kinky like that..
since my birthday in october i have been working and doing a honest days work during the day and waking up before that smug cunt Jeremy kyle pops his face on my telly box, its getting on the bus with the poor people and those frightened of the poor people, i however dont fall into either category, i have had to disregard any manners i have to get on the bus in the right order that i arrived at the bus stop, the people who get the bus just seem to push their way to the front even if they have just arrived and the cue is long, but i just get on in the order i arrived not before nor after, if anyone says anything they get greeted with a big "fuck off" and a threat of having me dance on their face to the song from Disneys Little mermaid _-Under the sea, which holds fond memories from my daughter as a baby playing the video tape so much it actually broke, thats before she filled our video up with toast she decided she didnt want to eat.. (just for the record, i dont make threats of violence, but i do find myself snapping and could quite possibly off the culprit)
its all part of the actually growing up and being stable, because as some of you may not know being a DJ is a great job when its going well and plenty of money when the work comes in.. but since the death of vinyl so many wannabe DJ's have come along who just download the music and offer to do bookings for free or petrol money.. this then affects work for DJ's who have built up a decent reputation and paid out thousands for songs, which support the people who make it and they keep making it, keeping the scene alive.
so what we have now? most decent producers dont make much money from their music now which then makes some of them "give up" or move on to other types of music, the scene then becomes stale as there isnt enough new decent music to keep the scene buzzing.
now we got clubs that aint busy, playing every type of music because they dont know whats gonna get people in.. its a sad time for clubbing and music.. and i know some of you will say that Garage is coming back and there were loads of decent & busy raves over christmas and new year, but yes.. thats a couple. its not a scene.
right peeps n bobs.. thats it for this weeks moaning.. please if you do have any thoughts about my blogs/podcasts please take the time to email me back i do love reading them and all ways try reply, if you dont wanna reply on facebook you can reply directly to my email: mrdblaze@hotmail.com
also feel free to add me on twitter @Danny_Blaze_uk
be good and take care!! x x
been getting in a bit of tournament poker lately, sunday i played in one at the mint casino and when we got down to the last 4 players, someone suggested we split the money, being in second place at the time i thought "why not", i was only gonna win £280 if we played it out and i actually won second place, and seeing as their was 3 other players to consider, i thought it not bad odds taking £250... sweetshop here i come!!
since the whole should i shouldn't i, with the Cambridge diet, i decided.. still not 100% convinced as i treat anything and everything with total and utter suspicion.. well i got a personal trainer who has allocated what i should eat and treats me to being able to do some boxing in the gym which includes hitting him, which is nice when you have had a stressful day, then the next day you get to ache all over for no extra money which is nice if you kinky like that..
since my birthday in october i have been working and doing a honest days work during the day and waking up before that smug cunt Jeremy kyle pops his face on my telly box, its getting on the bus with the poor people and those frightened of the poor people, i however dont fall into either category, i have had to disregard any manners i have to get on the bus in the right order that i arrived at the bus stop, the people who get the bus just seem to push their way to the front even if they have just arrived and the cue is long, but i just get on in the order i arrived not before nor after, if anyone says anything they get greeted with a big "fuck off" and a threat of having me dance on their face to the song from Disneys Little mermaid _-Under the sea, which holds fond memories from my daughter as a baby playing the video tape so much it actually broke, thats before she filled our video up with toast she decided she didnt want to eat.. (just for the record, i dont make threats of violence, but i do find myself snapping and could quite possibly off the culprit)
its all part of the actually growing up and being stable, because as some of you may not know being a DJ is a great job when its going well and plenty of money when the work comes in.. but since the death of vinyl so many wannabe DJ's have come along who just download the music and offer to do bookings for free or petrol money.. this then affects work for DJ's who have built up a decent reputation and paid out thousands for songs, which support the people who make it and they keep making it, keeping the scene alive.
so what we have now? most decent producers dont make much money from their music now which then makes some of them "give up" or move on to other types of music, the scene then becomes stale as there isnt enough new decent music to keep the scene buzzing.
now we got clubs that aint busy, playing every type of music because they dont know whats gonna get people in.. its a sad time for clubbing and music.. and i know some of you will say that Garage is coming back and there were loads of decent & busy raves over christmas and new year, but yes.. thats a couple. its not a scene.
right peeps n bobs.. thats it for this weeks moaning.. please if you do have any thoughts about my blogs/podcasts please take the time to email me back i do love reading them and all ways try reply, if you dont wanna reply on facebook you can reply directly to my email: mrdblaze@hotmail.com
also feel free to add me on twitter @Danny_Blaze_uk
be good and take care!! x x
re start 6th jan 2011
welcome peoples, finally found time to re start doing my Blogs... been up to loads good and baddd..
so now the snow has settled and melted from winter 2010 we look forward to the future of 2011, this is the time when everyone says they are going to have a better yeah and all that old shite, but remember..you can only change things by changing things, all the talking and facebook status's in the world aren't going to make you have a better year, day or 5 minutes.
For true happiness in life i think you may have to adopt the attitude of the three wise monkeys (look, hear and see now evil), i know it sounds off key but if your like me and you spend countless hours worrying about things that haven't even happened yet, then you set yourself up to be disappointed at every turn..or relieved when somebody lets you down because you expect them to anyway. its not great to look at life this way but you get to see things exactly how they are, kinda like waking up from being in the matrix.
Some people go through life relying on others and never standing on there own feet, this comes down to insecurity in their own abilities and not wanting to try and fail, they just dont have the character to except that kind of defeat.
But what i say is try your hand at anything you want, from sky diving to learning to knit.. my phobias as a child were being worried that nobody likes me. i kind of had the same issue as i got older, but it wasnt until i realised i was on my own and dealing with everything life threw at me, that i could see that i didnt actually care.
i know your wondering why im going on about this now, but its to do with changing you life for the better.. since my last blogs i decided that everything that i didnt like about my life could be sorted by facing things and having routine in my life.. i decided i needed a job to have a reason to get up in the morning. and what i have noticed is that when your body has routine it works a lot better, so with this also in mind i decided to get a personal trainer and have a diet plan written for me, so the long term plan is change eating habits for life and be under pressure to go gym even when im not in the mood..
I been asked how my comedy stuff is coming along, i wrote some material and was going to west end every Tuesday in December to practice in front of an audience. the hardest thing about doing stand up is remembering your jokes and the order you wanna tell them in, and they best way to do that is practise, something that i seem unable to do when im on my own, i feel so stupid looking in the mirror saying my jokes to myself and would conjure up thoughts of mental illness lol
so anyway's it got to the big night of my first paid GIG and i was asked to be there early and i was super nervous, and i was the first comic on.. my first joke bombed, then my second one.. i remember thinking this is not going well, then i was heckled my some guy and i tore into him and everyone laughed, so off the back on that confidence i just told my most offensive jokes and everyone was laughing, so i stayed on for another 5 minutes and thought i would finish whilst it was still going really well.. everyone was clapping which was a wicked buzz, better than any drugs ive ever had.
i was in Bromley about a week later and a big black guy walked right up to me and said "its you from the other night" now on hearing this i started to think he might of been the guy i was insulting.. i thought about denying it but figured it might not be a good idea in the long run, so i said "yep" waiting for the punch in the face, until he put out his hand and said he really likes my work and thought i was funny, which was a major relief.. then the sense on achievement came over me and i decided that i should probably do a professional comedy course and peruse it as a potential carer.. so in feb i will do the course and try do this comedy thing properly.
still on the comedy note, me and a friend called keith decided to record a comedy/banter podcast, its currently up in the i tunes top 20 (new and noteworthy) chart, this morning it was at number 4 which is quite an achievement seeing as we have only recorded 2 episodes, we will be recording them every 2 weeks for FREE download on itunes, as a massive favour i am asking as many of you as possible to download the podcast & try write a quick review, even if its 2 words, it all helps.. my long term goal with the pod-cast is to get a radio show on a legal radio station as it keiths goal, and i want to use this time to come up with new material for stand up, so it all goes in hand pretty much.
the pod-cast is called "Big and clever" and its posted up by "True Vip" all help is muchly appreciated.
http://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/big-clever-truevip/id411049804?ign-mpt=uo%3D4
if you have any topics or Garry news for the pod-cast please get in touch via email, twitter, smoke signal, facebook..well you get the idea.
right that's this weeks blog, to be honest i could go on for about another hour, but i dont think you got the time to read about what i been up to.. there really is loads..
until next weeks blog peoples, take care and if you are looking to change 2011, get off your arse and do it!!
please remember to drop your feedback too :-)
so now the snow has settled and melted from winter 2010 we look forward to the future of 2011, this is the time when everyone says they are going to have a better yeah and all that old shite, but remember..you can only change things by changing things, all the talking and facebook status's in the world aren't going to make you have a better year, day or 5 minutes.
For true happiness in life i think you may have to adopt the attitude of the three wise monkeys (look, hear and see now evil), i know it sounds off key but if your like me and you spend countless hours worrying about things that haven't even happened yet, then you set yourself up to be disappointed at every turn..or relieved when somebody lets you down because you expect them to anyway. its not great to look at life this way but you get to see things exactly how they are, kinda like waking up from being in the matrix.
Some people go through life relying on others and never standing on there own feet, this comes down to insecurity in their own abilities and not wanting to try and fail, they just dont have the character to except that kind of defeat.
But what i say is try your hand at anything you want, from sky diving to learning to knit.. my phobias as a child were being worried that nobody likes me. i kind of had the same issue as i got older, but it wasnt until i realised i was on my own and dealing with everything life threw at me, that i could see that i didnt actually care.
i know your wondering why im going on about this now, but its to do with changing you life for the better.. since my last blogs i decided that everything that i didnt like about my life could be sorted by facing things and having routine in my life.. i decided i needed a job to have a reason to get up in the morning. and what i have noticed is that when your body has routine it works a lot better, so with this also in mind i decided to get a personal trainer and have a diet plan written for me, so the long term plan is change eating habits for life and be under pressure to go gym even when im not in the mood..
I been asked how my comedy stuff is coming along, i wrote some material and was going to west end every Tuesday in December to practice in front of an audience. the hardest thing about doing stand up is remembering your jokes and the order you wanna tell them in, and they best way to do that is practise, something that i seem unable to do when im on my own, i feel so stupid looking in the mirror saying my jokes to myself and would conjure up thoughts of mental illness lol
so anyway's it got to the big night of my first paid GIG and i was asked to be there early and i was super nervous, and i was the first comic on.. my first joke bombed, then my second one.. i remember thinking this is not going well, then i was heckled my some guy and i tore into him and everyone laughed, so off the back on that confidence i just told my most offensive jokes and everyone was laughing, so i stayed on for another 5 minutes and thought i would finish whilst it was still going really well.. everyone was clapping which was a wicked buzz, better than any drugs ive ever had.
i was in Bromley about a week later and a big black guy walked right up to me and said "its you from the other night" now on hearing this i started to think he might of been the guy i was insulting.. i thought about denying it but figured it might not be a good idea in the long run, so i said "yep" waiting for the punch in the face, until he put out his hand and said he really likes my work and thought i was funny, which was a major relief.. then the sense on achievement came over me and i decided that i should probably do a professional comedy course and peruse it as a potential carer.. so in feb i will do the course and try do this comedy thing properly.
still on the comedy note, me and a friend called keith decided to record a comedy/banter podcast, its currently up in the i tunes top 20 (new and noteworthy) chart, this morning it was at number 4 which is quite an achievement seeing as we have only recorded 2 episodes, we will be recording them every 2 weeks for FREE download on itunes, as a massive favour i am asking as many of you as possible to download the podcast & try write a quick review, even if its 2 words, it all helps.. my long term goal with the pod-cast is to get a radio show on a legal radio station as it keiths goal, and i want to use this time to come up with new material for stand up, so it all goes in hand pretty much.
the pod-cast is called "Big and clever" and its posted up by "True Vip" all help is muchly appreciated.
http://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/big-clever-truevip/id411049804?ign-mpt=uo%3D4
if you have any topics or Garry news for the pod-cast please get in touch via email, twitter, smoke signal, facebook..well you get the idea.
right that's this weeks blog, to be honest i could go on for about another hour, but i dont think you got the time to read about what i been up to.. there really is loads..
until next weeks blog peoples, take care and if you are looking to change 2011, get off your arse and do it!!
please remember to drop your feedback too :-)
Wednesday, 14 July 2010
14th july 2010 1extreme 2 the other
So the weathers gone from one extreme to another last few days, so if you had all your shorts and t shirts washed, ironed and ready to go then like me you will be thinking what a fucking waste of time that was. I am going to carry on last week’s topic I think regarding one extreme to the other and the drug topic which a few of you lot found to be quite similar to your own experiences. Remember I am not bragging or encouraging anyone to take drugs because apart from being expensive they can ruin you lives and the lives of others around you.
After discovering pills at about 21/ 22 years old I was living in brockley house on east street, it was a one bedroom flat we rented of a girl called Amanda who I hated because she came across as a bully, she did ultimately let us stay there so I cant really say anything bad about her. Whilst living there I had no income and things were super tight, there are low points in my life that I remember and a couple of them were whilst living there, such as going to the shop with about 40p in pennies to buy a chocolate bar and it felt like a tramp paying for my twirl completely in coppers, but my addiction and craving for chocolate was so strong that the shame was worth the reward of the intense velvet flavored bar. Another low point which you may think is me over reacting was cooking a sausage stir fry. Now you may think there’s nothing wrong with putting sausages and rice together in a wok and knocking up an English twist to an ancient Chinese dish that’s been around since time began, other than the fact I don’t like sausages. But being poor the choices you get in life are slimmer than a supermodel with and eating disorder.
It’s amazing how your financial situation can motivate you into things that you might otherwise consider to be not your thing or how good something tastes when you haven’t eaten for that day, even if the said meal is something you hate.
At that time in my life its fair to say I had given up on a few things thinking life was going to always be that shit, I had the court case for access to my kids going on which was killing me, I was getting weekly letters from my kids mums solicitors calling me all the names under the sun. I wasn’t working and I had recently discovered the joys of taking drugs, namely ecstasy which was like taking a problem forgetting pill and all the hurt used to go away for that particular period.
What I then done was not to set up a shop or stall, but what came next seemed like a natural progression as if promoted from user to seller. I realized that I could make enough money to pay for my weekends out partying and have enough left over to get me through the week without having to scrape together pennies to buy chocolate bars and basic dinners. I’m not saying I went and bought a car or house, I was strictly small time.
After all, I knew people that I had grown up with selling FAKE pills by going and getting pro plus or any tablets on sale that could pass as ecstasy. Then file them down if necessary to remove any writing then finally coat them in “stop n grow” the nasty tasting substance used to coat your nails to stop you biting them. This made the pill taste bitter when taken so the person taking it believes that they are not buying a dud pill. As clever as it sounds I didn’t actually agree with this way of earning a living because sooner or later they would end up taking a beating because you cant go to trading standards with a faulty pill and get a refund off anyone, this was strictly a dangerous area of the field that I was only to happy to stay away from.
Not that I thought what I was doing was ok either, but I thought quite selfishly that I was not hurting anyone and having quite a good time in the process, meeting loads of new people and some of them people cant do enough for you, you are elevated into a position of folk hero, breaking the law for the good of the people who wanted to get wasted. Well that’s how it felt at the time. But the laws of club land are very different from the laws on the streets, for instance think about this.. dance clubs emerged off the back of illegal raves in the mid to late 80s and promotions and clubs were run by a lot of the people who put together the illegal raves, so how do you go from organizing illegal raves filled with drugs and drug dealers who were making thousands of pounds a night to running a legit club with no drugs in?? Answer you don’t. And why would you?
Some clubs and I am going to say some as my get out, some clubs allowed dealers to operate inside the club with the clubs blessing for a fee, now I’m not going to pretend I know every in and out of this operation because I have never done it on behalf of a club, the things I am presenting to you are things I have witnessed and been told whilst going out clubbing for years in a scene I loved and worshiped.
Going out was like a birthday at the end of a very stressed week, I was pretty much living for the weekends, no real money or work but having them weekends made up for a lot of the shit things that were going on at the time. I had to do a drug course later on when I was about 29 to be able to teach DJ workshops in schools and I remember the guy teaching us saying that ecstasy in its purest form is pretty safe if taken properly, I couldn’t believe my ears.
There hasn’t been enough study into it to say otherwise, but I am not going to suggest you do it, after all the downsides are looking down syndrome, sweating like a pedophile in a playground as well as the comedowns and depression you suffer after prolonged usage, it can also lead to paranoia and trigger mental breakdowns, because remember what goes up must come down.
Drugs and drink are responsible for many situations that I have been in that I wouldn’t have been in otherwise, some of them good and others bad, anyone who says they remain unaffected from years of drug taking are probably not aware of their symptoms or the long term damage they have suffered.
Before I rap up this bit about drugs I want you to be aware of a few facts, more people die each year from alcohol related incidents including drinking alcohol and smoking than any drug related incidents. If the governments legalized drugs here, we would have to be friends and do business with the people we have been demonising since time began and it would be very hard to tax, after all people have been smuggling them in and can get around paying the tax. Look at the cigarette situation in this county, abroad fags are cheap, but if you’re a smoker in the UK you have to pay a high duty on them because they are addictive and people will continue to buy them even if they get to £10 for 20. But now we are at the stage where we all know someone selling cigarettes illegally, you can get 200 for £20/£25 depending on your brand, as a county we are standing up to the government and saying we won’t stop smoking but we will not pay what you want us to.. (now reading back it seems like I’m really interested in politics, but let me reassure you I’m not, I just like to be aware and I’m a nosey fucker lol)
Fucking hell another rant over, quickly I know I shouldn’t and I said I wouldn’t but I’m 4 days in on this Cambridge diet, I feel pissed off its got to this but I need to get down to what I want to be and its very hard as per this topic being all or nothing, I could lie and what have you, but I cant be arsed.
I will let you know how I get on, please remember to drop your feedback, it does make me feel like I’m not sitting in a room babbling and going mad lol
Right in the words of jerry Springer >> fuck off lol
After discovering pills at about 21/ 22 years old I was living in brockley house on east street, it was a one bedroom flat we rented of a girl called Amanda who I hated because she came across as a bully, she did ultimately let us stay there so I cant really say anything bad about her. Whilst living there I had no income and things were super tight, there are low points in my life that I remember and a couple of them were whilst living there, such as going to the shop with about 40p in pennies to buy a chocolate bar and it felt like a tramp paying for my twirl completely in coppers, but my addiction and craving for chocolate was so strong that the shame was worth the reward of the intense velvet flavored bar. Another low point which you may think is me over reacting was cooking a sausage stir fry. Now you may think there’s nothing wrong with putting sausages and rice together in a wok and knocking up an English twist to an ancient Chinese dish that’s been around since time began, other than the fact I don’t like sausages. But being poor the choices you get in life are slimmer than a supermodel with and eating disorder.
It’s amazing how your financial situation can motivate you into things that you might otherwise consider to be not your thing or how good something tastes when you haven’t eaten for that day, even if the said meal is something you hate.
At that time in my life its fair to say I had given up on a few things thinking life was going to always be that shit, I had the court case for access to my kids going on which was killing me, I was getting weekly letters from my kids mums solicitors calling me all the names under the sun. I wasn’t working and I had recently discovered the joys of taking drugs, namely ecstasy which was like taking a problem forgetting pill and all the hurt used to go away for that particular period.
What I then done was not to set up a shop or stall, but what came next seemed like a natural progression as if promoted from user to seller. I realized that I could make enough money to pay for my weekends out partying and have enough left over to get me through the week without having to scrape together pennies to buy chocolate bars and basic dinners. I’m not saying I went and bought a car or house, I was strictly small time.
After all, I knew people that I had grown up with selling FAKE pills by going and getting pro plus or any tablets on sale that could pass as ecstasy. Then file them down if necessary to remove any writing then finally coat them in “stop n grow” the nasty tasting substance used to coat your nails to stop you biting them. This made the pill taste bitter when taken so the person taking it believes that they are not buying a dud pill. As clever as it sounds I didn’t actually agree with this way of earning a living because sooner or later they would end up taking a beating because you cant go to trading standards with a faulty pill and get a refund off anyone, this was strictly a dangerous area of the field that I was only to happy to stay away from.
Not that I thought what I was doing was ok either, but I thought quite selfishly that I was not hurting anyone and having quite a good time in the process, meeting loads of new people and some of them people cant do enough for you, you are elevated into a position of folk hero, breaking the law for the good of the people who wanted to get wasted. Well that’s how it felt at the time. But the laws of club land are very different from the laws on the streets, for instance think about this.. dance clubs emerged off the back of illegal raves in the mid to late 80s and promotions and clubs were run by a lot of the people who put together the illegal raves, so how do you go from organizing illegal raves filled with drugs and drug dealers who were making thousands of pounds a night to running a legit club with no drugs in?? Answer you don’t. And why would you?
Some clubs and I am going to say some as my get out, some clubs allowed dealers to operate inside the club with the clubs blessing for a fee, now I’m not going to pretend I know every in and out of this operation because I have never done it on behalf of a club, the things I am presenting to you are things I have witnessed and been told whilst going out clubbing for years in a scene I loved and worshiped.
Going out was like a birthday at the end of a very stressed week, I was pretty much living for the weekends, no real money or work but having them weekends made up for a lot of the shit things that were going on at the time. I had to do a drug course later on when I was about 29 to be able to teach DJ workshops in schools and I remember the guy teaching us saying that ecstasy in its purest form is pretty safe if taken properly, I couldn’t believe my ears.
There hasn’t been enough study into it to say otherwise, but I am not going to suggest you do it, after all the downsides are looking down syndrome, sweating like a pedophile in a playground as well as the comedowns and depression you suffer after prolonged usage, it can also lead to paranoia and trigger mental breakdowns, because remember what goes up must come down.
Drugs and drink are responsible for many situations that I have been in that I wouldn’t have been in otherwise, some of them good and others bad, anyone who says they remain unaffected from years of drug taking are probably not aware of their symptoms or the long term damage they have suffered.
Before I rap up this bit about drugs I want you to be aware of a few facts, more people die each year from alcohol related incidents including drinking alcohol and smoking than any drug related incidents. If the governments legalized drugs here, we would have to be friends and do business with the people we have been demonising since time began and it would be very hard to tax, after all people have been smuggling them in and can get around paying the tax. Look at the cigarette situation in this county, abroad fags are cheap, but if you’re a smoker in the UK you have to pay a high duty on them because they are addictive and people will continue to buy them even if they get to £10 for 20. But now we are at the stage where we all know someone selling cigarettes illegally, you can get 200 for £20/£25 depending on your brand, as a county we are standing up to the government and saying we won’t stop smoking but we will not pay what you want us to.. (now reading back it seems like I’m really interested in politics, but let me reassure you I’m not, I just like to be aware and I’m a nosey fucker lol)
Fucking hell another rant over, quickly I know I shouldn’t and I said I wouldn’t but I’m 4 days in on this Cambridge diet, I feel pissed off its got to this but I need to get down to what I want to be and its very hard as per this topic being all or nothing, I could lie and what have you, but I cant be arsed.
I will let you know how I get on, please remember to drop your feedback, it does make me feel like I’m not sitting in a room babbling and going mad lol
Right in the words of jerry Springer >> fuck off lol
Thursday, 1 July 2010
1st july 2010 the drugs dont work
When I was a child I used to gorge on chocolate and listen to pirate radio stations like Lightning Fm, then I managed to get a job and used to play fruit machines and lost most of what I earnt on more than one occasion. But what seemed to happen was that a cheeky fiver became twenty pounds and by then your chasing the money you lost, thinking that the machine was about to pay out at any minute. You couldn’t walk away because somebody else will walk up, put in twenty pence and win all your money. But it’s not your money is it really? Because as soon as you put it into the machine it becomes someone else’s money, so you really don’t have a claim to it. Well I hated walking away but once you have spent all you have in cash, there’s nothing else to do other than watch someone else put in that one coin and win the jackpot. It’s at this point that you feel a failure. All sorts of things used to run through my head and a bout of depression would set in. At the time this was happening I was about 18 and wasn’t really a fan of Pubs, so I didn’t go in very often, not to mention the fact that I had 2 kids aged one and two. Don’t get me wrong I didn’t spend the money for nappies or clothes on fruit machines, it was money that I just happened to have. Money that I could have put to good use.
Then as I got older, well I was about 21/22 I started experimenting with speed, I always said I wouldn’t touch drugs because my mums husband became a heroin addict and we had to leave home to get away from the cunt. So not taking drugs and not smoking was a very easy thing to say no to, but after splitting up with my kids mum, I sort of thought my world had ended, well at the time it had because I was still young and I didn’t know any better, or any different I should say, I had been with her from the age of 15 and had grown up together, its a bit silly now when you think of it, but at the time I needed a distraction, so DJ’ing became a good way to express myself and achieve something in the way of pride and a little extra money that didn’t involve crime.
When I became a weekly resident I started drinking loads whilst I was DJ’ing partly nerves and partly just being upset over the split, a friend of mine said to me that speed keeps you sober but keeps the happy vibe from the alcohol. And to start with it worked a treat; I would have gone on ITV after Coronation Street and promoted speed as the perfect accompaniment to drinking loads of lager.
It was then that I got introduced to the club scene and started going to channel club and strawberry Sundays in Vauxhall, it was in channel club that some guy we were out with suggested I take an E. Now what I should have said is no but in the spirit of things I thought “fuck it, why not?” so we split the pill 3 ways. It tasted absolutely vile but at the time it seemed un cool to mention it, so I just cracked on and waited for the effects to take over.
I couldn’t tell you how long it took but I can still remember coming over all warm as if you was snuggled up in your favorite pajamas in front of a hot fire drinking hot chocolate whilst it’s snowing outside. I was sat in room two and the song playing was Insomnia by faithless, I was sat on a podium thing drinking a can of red stripe (I can assure you that is not a drink I would order at a bar, but in them clubs its all they had in the way of lager... I think it’s cheap to buy in, but they sold it for about £3). There was one of them fans that turn’s around in different directions, and every time it was on me I felt better and when it was off me, I became hot and sluggish. It was at that point I started to become a bit worried because I wasn’t in control and it felt different from any feeling I had ever felt before, it was at that point that someone sat down with me and told me not to panic.
Enter Sandra, she was a complete stranger up to that point, she’s a black woman who loves clubbing through and through, whatever it is, clubbing looks as though it courses through her veins. She explained what was happening to me and the worst thing I can do is panic, the girl I was with was monged out and was enjoying the feeling as she had a big stupid grin on her face and the bloke was off dancing somewhere, so it was all down to Sandra to stop me having a panic attack. Now you think that would of been the last time I would of taken ecstasy, but my friends I cant tell a lie and say its a bad thing I done because on reflection I enjoyed it so much that I went out most weekends and ate doves, I love you’s, Mercedes, Rolex’s and all sorts of names that seemed a bit weird at the time but I suppose brand awareness is quite important, even in the drug making business, lol
The problem with some if not most drugs is that they certainly do lead to taking other drugs, I’m not saying if you smoke a bit of puff your going to be on heroin before the nights out, but once you open certain doors the rest of the drug options seem to present themselves like walking into a sweet shop and asking for a kit kat chunky, now the shop owner doesn’t want to tell you that he hasn’t been to the cash and carry, so he tries to show you the new kit kat chunky now with caramel. Yes folks its better than the original and has more sugar for your money than the boring old chunky version, that’s pretty much how some people sell you drugs, you might go to buy speed and walk out with ketamine, coke or baby teething powder if your not careful. The drug business is not regulated and follows no rules other than they are breaking the law. Now some people, well most people don’t mind bending a few rules or even breaking tiny non important laws like parking on a double red line. But the drugs game is a very different animal, you face years in prison and the prospect of not being able to get a decent job if you ever get out, so why do so many people risk getting caught taking and selling the fucking things?
Escapism is the answer, I don’t care how happy someone says they are, how many houses, cars or blow jobs they get, if they take drugs its part escapism or as it was in my case switching off, or being able to switch off and escape from any problems that were in my life at the time. Certain drugs give you a comfort blanket that protects you from whatever’s bothering you. Anyone who takes drugs regularly and says that nothing bothers then or that they are happy is probably lying to you and themselves, some drugs become a coping mechanism for all manner of situations from smoking weed because you can do your job standing on your head to sniffing cocaine because you work in a high octane environment such as a trader on the futures market, I’m not saying everyone does because I’m not everywhere to say that its the truth, I’m just saying it goes on.
Up to now you have probably got the impression that I advocate taking drugs, well let me clear something up. I do not.
What I haven’t got to yes is the day after the night before, have you heard of the saying what goes up must come down? Well it’s a true as life itself.
Being 22 I was able to go out all night, take a few drugs such as ecstasy and drink loads of alcohol and get into my bed at 9am, then wake up at 5 in the afternoon as if I had been in bed at 9.55pm with a cup of coco, then skip forward 5 years. I was able and needed to take more drugs for it to have any affect and staying up would sometimes include me by myself sniffing coke and taking ecstasy with a glass of vodka on the go. This is when what started out as a social pastime became an addiction and the good times were defiantly outweighing the good. Paranoia had set in and my mental state was less than fragile. Some people find themselves owing money for the nights that never ended and working all week to pay dealers for drugs that they smoked or sniffed. I was fortunate to be earning enough money to not owe anyone any thing but know and met enough people who would sell you their property such as personal music players, videos just to get more money to buy more drugs.
Its like working in clubs every week, I get to see people at their best, happy and up for a laugh, they drink as if they are rich and take various drugs, but then the can you lend me money comes out of the mouth and you have to think can this guy pay me back? I remember lending a guy £40 once so he could stay out longer, he gave me his cash point card and said he would ring me the next day with his pin number so I could go to the bank and draw the cash out. Now that seemed pretty reasonable as the guy had been coming to the club for ages and was a friend of a friend. Well let me just say that he didn’t ring me the next day and I have never seen him since, the lengths people will go to ah!
Right more next week about all the ups n downs of drugs, I just want to thank everyone who sponsored me for the charity bike ride I done on Sunday, I just want to say it was fucking easy and have decide to try and keep the training up to do the London to Brighton and the London to Windsor ride which is much longer than 27 miles. Its not too late to sponsor me as I need to get the fund up about and other £100, so if everyone gives £5 it will exceed my target, all you have to do is click on www.justgiving.com/daniel-blaze and use your debit card or credit card, its simple or if you don’t feel safe you can in box me on facebook and arrange to give me the cash and I will put it on for you, I have to say special thanks to Sarah LT from crawley , Express national Carriers (the best cab company in London, use them loads as they are great, the numbers 0207 404 3333), Ekrim, Alex, Hux, EJB, Richie, Lisa & Nancy, Dwayne, Michelle Buckley, Cheryl , Stacy, Sam, Natalie, Mc Sez, Dj Metts, Digital disco plus everyone who is yet to still give me the cash. Oh and I cant forget to say thanks to Barbra and Andrew who arranged it all, id love for you guys to be my Mum & Dad, and they gave a £100 sponsorship which is above and beyond the call of duty considering everything they done on the day.. Thanks to you all xx
Right remember you can shout me with your feedback on this blogs, it does mean a lot when you do so do the right thing lol..
Have a lovely time in this weather, I’m off to knock out 30 miles on my bike like its nothing lol
Then as I got older, well I was about 21/22 I started experimenting with speed, I always said I wouldn’t touch drugs because my mums husband became a heroin addict and we had to leave home to get away from the cunt. So not taking drugs and not smoking was a very easy thing to say no to, but after splitting up with my kids mum, I sort of thought my world had ended, well at the time it had because I was still young and I didn’t know any better, or any different I should say, I had been with her from the age of 15 and had grown up together, its a bit silly now when you think of it, but at the time I needed a distraction, so DJ’ing became a good way to express myself and achieve something in the way of pride and a little extra money that didn’t involve crime.
When I became a weekly resident I started drinking loads whilst I was DJ’ing partly nerves and partly just being upset over the split, a friend of mine said to me that speed keeps you sober but keeps the happy vibe from the alcohol. And to start with it worked a treat; I would have gone on ITV after Coronation Street and promoted speed as the perfect accompaniment to drinking loads of lager.
It was then that I got introduced to the club scene and started going to channel club and strawberry Sundays in Vauxhall, it was in channel club that some guy we were out with suggested I take an E. Now what I should have said is no but in the spirit of things I thought “fuck it, why not?” so we split the pill 3 ways. It tasted absolutely vile but at the time it seemed un cool to mention it, so I just cracked on and waited for the effects to take over.
I couldn’t tell you how long it took but I can still remember coming over all warm as if you was snuggled up in your favorite pajamas in front of a hot fire drinking hot chocolate whilst it’s snowing outside. I was sat in room two and the song playing was Insomnia by faithless, I was sat on a podium thing drinking a can of red stripe (I can assure you that is not a drink I would order at a bar, but in them clubs its all they had in the way of lager... I think it’s cheap to buy in, but they sold it for about £3). There was one of them fans that turn’s around in different directions, and every time it was on me I felt better and when it was off me, I became hot and sluggish. It was at that point I started to become a bit worried because I wasn’t in control and it felt different from any feeling I had ever felt before, it was at that point that someone sat down with me and told me not to panic.
Enter Sandra, she was a complete stranger up to that point, she’s a black woman who loves clubbing through and through, whatever it is, clubbing looks as though it courses through her veins. She explained what was happening to me and the worst thing I can do is panic, the girl I was with was monged out and was enjoying the feeling as she had a big stupid grin on her face and the bloke was off dancing somewhere, so it was all down to Sandra to stop me having a panic attack. Now you think that would of been the last time I would of taken ecstasy, but my friends I cant tell a lie and say its a bad thing I done because on reflection I enjoyed it so much that I went out most weekends and ate doves, I love you’s, Mercedes, Rolex’s and all sorts of names that seemed a bit weird at the time but I suppose brand awareness is quite important, even in the drug making business, lol
The problem with some if not most drugs is that they certainly do lead to taking other drugs, I’m not saying if you smoke a bit of puff your going to be on heroin before the nights out, but once you open certain doors the rest of the drug options seem to present themselves like walking into a sweet shop and asking for a kit kat chunky, now the shop owner doesn’t want to tell you that he hasn’t been to the cash and carry, so he tries to show you the new kit kat chunky now with caramel. Yes folks its better than the original and has more sugar for your money than the boring old chunky version, that’s pretty much how some people sell you drugs, you might go to buy speed and walk out with ketamine, coke or baby teething powder if your not careful. The drug business is not regulated and follows no rules other than they are breaking the law. Now some people, well most people don’t mind bending a few rules or even breaking tiny non important laws like parking on a double red line. But the drugs game is a very different animal, you face years in prison and the prospect of not being able to get a decent job if you ever get out, so why do so many people risk getting caught taking and selling the fucking things?
Escapism is the answer, I don’t care how happy someone says they are, how many houses, cars or blow jobs they get, if they take drugs its part escapism or as it was in my case switching off, or being able to switch off and escape from any problems that were in my life at the time. Certain drugs give you a comfort blanket that protects you from whatever’s bothering you. Anyone who takes drugs regularly and says that nothing bothers then or that they are happy is probably lying to you and themselves, some drugs become a coping mechanism for all manner of situations from smoking weed because you can do your job standing on your head to sniffing cocaine because you work in a high octane environment such as a trader on the futures market, I’m not saying everyone does because I’m not everywhere to say that its the truth, I’m just saying it goes on.
Up to now you have probably got the impression that I advocate taking drugs, well let me clear something up. I do not.
What I haven’t got to yes is the day after the night before, have you heard of the saying what goes up must come down? Well it’s a true as life itself.
Being 22 I was able to go out all night, take a few drugs such as ecstasy and drink loads of alcohol and get into my bed at 9am, then wake up at 5 in the afternoon as if I had been in bed at 9.55pm with a cup of coco, then skip forward 5 years. I was able and needed to take more drugs for it to have any affect and staying up would sometimes include me by myself sniffing coke and taking ecstasy with a glass of vodka on the go. This is when what started out as a social pastime became an addiction and the good times were defiantly outweighing the good. Paranoia had set in and my mental state was less than fragile. Some people find themselves owing money for the nights that never ended and working all week to pay dealers for drugs that they smoked or sniffed. I was fortunate to be earning enough money to not owe anyone any thing but know and met enough people who would sell you their property such as personal music players, videos just to get more money to buy more drugs.
Its like working in clubs every week, I get to see people at their best, happy and up for a laugh, they drink as if they are rich and take various drugs, but then the can you lend me money comes out of the mouth and you have to think can this guy pay me back? I remember lending a guy £40 once so he could stay out longer, he gave me his cash point card and said he would ring me the next day with his pin number so I could go to the bank and draw the cash out. Now that seemed pretty reasonable as the guy had been coming to the club for ages and was a friend of a friend. Well let me just say that he didn’t ring me the next day and I have never seen him since, the lengths people will go to ah!
Right more next week about all the ups n downs of drugs, I just want to thank everyone who sponsored me for the charity bike ride I done on Sunday, I just want to say it was fucking easy and have decide to try and keep the training up to do the London to Brighton and the London to Windsor ride which is much longer than 27 miles. Its not too late to sponsor me as I need to get the fund up about and other £100, so if everyone gives £5 it will exceed my target, all you have to do is click on www.justgiving.com/daniel-blaze and use your debit card or credit card, its simple or if you don’t feel safe you can in box me on facebook and arrange to give me the cash and I will put it on for you, I have to say special thanks to Sarah LT from crawley , Express national Carriers (the best cab company in London, use them loads as they are great, the numbers 0207 404 3333), Ekrim, Alex, Hux, EJB, Richie, Lisa & Nancy, Dwayne, Michelle Buckley, Cheryl , Stacy, Sam, Natalie, Mc Sez, Dj Metts, Digital disco plus everyone who is yet to still give me the cash. Oh and I cant forget to say thanks to Barbra and Andrew who arranged it all, id love for you guys to be my Mum & Dad, and they gave a £100 sponsorship which is above and beyond the call of duty considering everything they done on the day.. Thanks to you all xx
Right remember you can shout me with your feedback on this blogs, it does mean a lot when you do so do the right thing lol..
Have a lovely time in this weather, I’m off to knock out 30 miles on my bike like its nothing lol
Tuesday, 15 June 2010
15th June 2010 Jesus saves - put him in goal for England
7 days without prayer makes one weak.. the church have had to result to word play to grab peoples attention because of church attendance numbers being at an all time low unless you count the African churches that have popped up like sweat shops all over the place, housing them in clubs, tenant halls and any place that’s available.
I remember from the De Vinci code that written in the bible or somewhere is the saying that I am all around you, lift a stone, break a piece of wood and I am there. What I got from that message was that you do not need to go to church to pray, because god (I would just like to point out at this moment in time that I do not believe in god, well I don’t believe in god as we have been told it, but more about that in a bit, well maybe as I don’t actually know what I am going to write next) is everywhere.
I really don’t know why I don’t believe in god or the version of god we have been told exists, it just seems highly unlikely that things would be as they are now if such a being existed, after all why would he send his so called son (yeah that’s Jesus) down to earth and we have heard no more since? And the stories in the bible all contradict each other. I watched some programme the other day saying as a kid Jesus was a really naughty kid (I know that just sounds weird don’t it), he was believed to be involved in his friends death (how could they accuse him of all people, lol), they thought he pushed his mate off a roof and he fell to his death. Now I know you are dying (excuse the pun) to know how this story resolved itself, because I’m sure you haven’t got the impression of lord and savior was some sort of rude boy who people were scared of, who went round pushing people off roofs if they didn’t do what he said.
No our mate on the cross (well before he was on the cross) brought his mate back from the dead to tell people that he didn’t kill him, brilliant! Maybe he should come back to earth and solve a few murder mysteries for us. But seeing as his dad (yes I’m mean god) is everywhere he wouldn’t even need to turn up to the scene of the crime, he could just send a text message or email to save man hours.
I’m not sure if you are actually aware that the bible is loads of other books, well parts of other books put together so the people of the time it was written can all stick to one set of rules and guidelines if you want to call it that (I’m sure there is a more official name, but I’m going to stick with my way of explaining things). Well basically a group was set up to pick and choose stories and letters from all these other books to make one official book. There were books and stories that were not put in at the time but were considered to be just as or more important than the ones finally chosen.
There was one on Mary, whom they say remained a virgin throughout her life but had other kids, so you can’t be sure that it’s the truth. There was a version of one called Adam and eve that says that one of there sons married a woman. But seeing as they were the only humans invented by god, it doesn’t add up because who was she? One book called the book of jubilees says that he married his own sister. Now that sounds about right in my opinion, but either way it’s all a load of shit. None of it is consistent and lets face it, there was fuck all else to do in them times other than have sex, eat and pray.
You might think this is all a bit weird banging on about religion but I am fascinated by the fact that so many people believe and have faith in something that doesn’t stand up to scrutiny. If you have been to or seen a programme that shows what happens in a court room, you will know that you have to swear on the bible to say that you are not lying. Come on how fucking stupid is that?
Even if you do not believe in god, fairy’s or even that the moon is made of cheese you have to swear on a book of stories to say that you are not going to tell any lies in court. I will be honest with you now and tell you I have lied in court, it’s a serious matter called perjury and if found out you can go to prison. But my reason for telling you is that putting you hand on a bible and saying that the sky is luminous black with pink spots is not going to make anything happen, the sky is not going to open up and a big hand come down and give you a dry slap. So ask yourself why the fuck do they do it. All I can think is tradition.
So now the bible bashing bit is over how the hell are you? I been trying to prepare mentally for this 26 mile bike ride I have coming up next week Sunday, I know its going to kill me if I’m honest but I will get through it so I don’t let anyone down. I’m trying to raise £500 because its a nice round figure, I have set a just giving page which is linked to the charity that I am supporting and you can use your debit or credit card to make a donation, it really does count even if you only donate £1 or £100, and it all goes straight to the charity with no funny business, as I am the most skeptical person when it comes to giving my card details out. If you would like to sponsor me the web address is http://www.justgiving.com/Daniel-blaze or if you are in south London you can just give me the cash and fill out a sponsor sheet. So far if everyone who has said gives me the cash I will have raised nearly £300, so not far left to go, so don’t be fucking tight and gives ya fuckin money (that was a bob Geldof quote there, but I’m using it now lol)
I tried doing that fucking Cambridge diet last week, I got to day 5 and gave up, I really don’t know what the fucks the matter with me, and I’m just going to mug it off and get into this training and gym and maybe gradually cut out eating the junk I eat. I do feel like a bit of a failure for not being able to stick to it, but you cant spend your life stopping and starting it as it means I have a constant headache and never got any fucking energy as the first couple of weeks is the killer. So tomorrow which is Wednesday I am going to get back out on my bike and go gym this week and eat what the fuck I want for now and see how that pans out.
Went to see the Michael McIntyre comedy road show last night and had a really good night and was lucky enough to meet him during and after the show, not really a bin fan but he was actually funny, so I have to give him ratings. What happens is comedians write there material and try it out over and over again until its funnier to a more commercial crowd, but for me by then its been watered down and a bit shit, so I think the smaller venues like the comedy store are much better than going to see them in a 30’000 venues when all you can see is a dot on the stage. Keep it real peoples.
Right I am going to chip (remember that old skool saying), but please remember to drop feedback on my blogs or any opinions you might have feel free to share them as I’m always interested and even fascinated in some cases. So with that in mind have a lovely week and have a think about what I said about religion, it’s all down to the individual but I hate being lied to.
Be good Daniel Blaze
I remember from the De Vinci code that written in the bible or somewhere is the saying that I am all around you, lift a stone, break a piece of wood and I am there. What I got from that message was that you do not need to go to church to pray, because god (I would just like to point out at this moment in time that I do not believe in god, well I don’t believe in god as we have been told it, but more about that in a bit, well maybe as I don’t actually know what I am going to write next) is everywhere.
I really don’t know why I don’t believe in god or the version of god we have been told exists, it just seems highly unlikely that things would be as they are now if such a being existed, after all why would he send his so called son (yeah that’s Jesus) down to earth and we have heard no more since? And the stories in the bible all contradict each other. I watched some programme the other day saying as a kid Jesus was a really naughty kid (I know that just sounds weird don’t it), he was believed to be involved in his friends death (how could they accuse him of all people, lol), they thought he pushed his mate off a roof and he fell to his death. Now I know you are dying (excuse the pun) to know how this story resolved itself, because I’m sure you haven’t got the impression of lord and savior was some sort of rude boy who people were scared of, who went round pushing people off roofs if they didn’t do what he said.
No our mate on the cross (well before he was on the cross) brought his mate back from the dead to tell people that he didn’t kill him, brilliant! Maybe he should come back to earth and solve a few murder mysteries for us. But seeing as his dad (yes I’m mean god) is everywhere he wouldn’t even need to turn up to the scene of the crime, he could just send a text message or email to save man hours.
I’m not sure if you are actually aware that the bible is loads of other books, well parts of other books put together so the people of the time it was written can all stick to one set of rules and guidelines if you want to call it that (I’m sure there is a more official name, but I’m going to stick with my way of explaining things). Well basically a group was set up to pick and choose stories and letters from all these other books to make one official book. There were books and stories that were not put in at the time but were considered to be just as or more important than the ones finally chosen.
There was one on Mary, whom they say remained a virgin throughout her life but had other kids, so you can’t be sure that it’s the truth. There was a version of one called Adam and eve that says that one of there sons married a woman. But seeing as they were the only humans invented by god, it doesn’t add up because who was she? One book called the book of jubilees says that he married his own sister. Now that sounds about right in my opinion, but either way it’s all a load of shit. None of it is consistent and lets face it, there was fuck all else to do in them times other than have sex, eat and pray.
You might think this is all a bit weird banging on about religion but I am fascinated by the fact that so many people believe and have faith in something that doesn’t stand up to scrutiny. If you have been to or seen a programme that shows what happens in a court room, you will know that you have to swear on the bible to say that you are not lying. Come on how fucking stupid is that?
Even if you do not believe in god, fairy’s or even that the moon is made of cheese you have to swear on a book of stories to say that you are not going to tell any lies in court. I will be honest with you now and tell you I have lied in court, it’s a serious matter called perjury and if found out you can go to prison. But my reason for telling you is that putting you hand on a bible and saying that the sky is luminous black with pink spots is not going to make anything happen, the sky is not going to open up and a big hand come down and give you a dry slap. So ask yourself why the fuck do they do it. All I can think is tradition.
So now the bible bashing bit is over how the hell are you? I been trying to prepare mentally for this 26 mile bike ride I have coming up next week Sunday, I know its going to kill me if I’m honest but I will get through it so I don’t let anyone down. I’m trying to raise £500 because its a nice round figure, I have set a just giving page which is linked to the charity that I am supporting and you can use your debit or credit card to make a donation, it really does count even if you only donate £1 or £100, and it all goes straight to the charity with no funny business, as I am the most skeptical person when it comes to giving my card details out. If you would like to sponsor me the web address is http://www.justgiving.com/Daniel-blaze or if you are in south London you can just give me the cash and fill out a sponsor sheet. So far if everyone who has said gives me the cash I will have raised nearly £300, so not far left to go, so don’t be fucking tight and gives ya fuckin money (that was a bob Geldof quote there, but I’m using it now lol)
I tried doing that fucking Cambridge diet last week, I got to day 5 and gave up, I really don’t know what the fucks the matter with me, and I’m just going to mug it off and get into this training and gym and maybe gradually cut out eating the junk I eat. I do feel like a bit of a failure for not being able to stick to it, but you cant spend your life stopping and starting it as it means I have a constant headache and never got any fucking energy as the first couple of weeks is the killer. So tomorrow which is Wednesday I am going to get back out on my bike and go gym this week and eat what the fuck I want for now and see how that pans out.
Went to see the Michael McIntyre comedy road show last night and had a really good night and was lucky enough to meet him during and after the show, not really a bin fan but he was actually funny, so I have to give him ratings. What happens is comedians write there material and try it out over and over again until its funnier to a more commercial crowd, but for me by then its been watered down and a bit shit, so I think the smaller venues like the comedy store are much better than going to see them in a 30’000 venues when all you can see is a dot on the stage. Keep it real peoples.
Right I am going to chip (remember that old skool saying), but please remember to drop feedback on my blogs or any opinions you might have feel free to share them as I’m always interested and even fascinated in some cases. So with that in mind have a lovely week and have a think about what I said about religion, it’s all down to the individual but I hate being lied to.
Be good Daniel Blaze
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